Do you find Jesus a horrible person?

"Wheelerguy" (wheelerguy) 08/04/2015 at 05:07 • Filed to: None

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Do you think he’s a blithering idiot? That he’s just like every other health fad propagator being put down at Gawker, Jezebel and Deadspin, only worse because he says His Word is law?

Is everything he said wrong, or is he just a crazed bloke who thinks it’s easy to forgive that ISIS bloke raping your sister as his mates torture you and your dad because you believe in Jesus? Or maybe he’s both?

If you ever meet him today—over a McFlurry, in a mall, during a track day, at the check-out counter, or even after a date with the microsurgeon—and you talked with him, you went along with him—what would you tell your wife/husband/girlfriend/boyfriend/mom/dad? How would you describe Jesus if you met and talked to the actual man and person today?

Eh, I’m just messing with you. What I really want to ask is... why is !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! ’s Kinja spelled !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! ? It looks like a name of a horse, like Somethingroyal or Easyfromthegitgo or Imawildandcrazyguy (I did not make that up— !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! !) or my favorite, a local racehorse called Rightsaidfred. I am nothing more but curious.

Oh, and another thing: Gene Hass admits, !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , that he might not get the Hulk an American F1 car seat. Haas F1 might get caught out, and while Ferrari’s dev drivers are good enough, the Hulk might just be the driver that can put Haas F1 on the map.

KirkyV > Wheelerguy 08/04/2015 at 05:11

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I find fish and bread an inadequate substitute for meat and bread. Or eel and bread, for that matter.

this is not matt farah's foxbodymiata > Wheelerguy 08/04/2015 at 05:37

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I think Jesus was just some hippy dude who wanted everyone to chill out and be nice to each other, and who would be very confused if he knew some of the shit that’s attributed to him these days.

TwinCharged - Is Now UK Opponaut > Wheelerguy 08/04/2015 at 05:40

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I thought you were talking about Jesus Diaz, who is equally as horrid.

Kat Callahan > Wheelerguy 08/04/2015 at 06:47

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I like Jesus. I dislike His servants, by and large.

I identify as an extreme leftwing liberal Episcopalian, though. Was born and raised Catholic, attended mostly Catholic schools in New Mexico and Texas. Actually deeply devout to my own idea of what Christianity means to me, but rarely discuss it because it means getting shat on by both conservative Christians and ardent Atheists. So I usually keep my mouth shut unless someone asks.

spanfucker retire bitch > Wheelerguy 08/04/2015 at 07:25

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Oh, were you not talking about that self-fellating fuck; Jesus Diaz?

Funktheduck > TwinCharged - Is Now UK Opponaut 08/04/2015 at 08:02

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That's what I thought at first. Diaz is a human turd.

Wheelerguy > Kat Callahan 08/04/2015 at 08:22

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But is SteveLehto an excellent name for a race horse?

Wheelerguy > spanfucker retire bitch 08/04/2015 at 08:23

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No, I’m talking about Nico Hulkenberg.

Nononono, I am talking about that horse SteveLehto.

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > Kat Callahan 08/04/2015 at 08:59

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What was it Ghandi said about it? Something about liking Christ, but Christians weren’t very cool.

Kat Callahan > Wheelerguy 08/04/2015 at 09:05

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Not surreal enough. Needs to be more like “SteveLehto’sLawLibrary”

R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet > Kat Callahan 08/04/2015 at 09:33

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Stay with me on this, but all that talk and thought from bible study as a child about the “spiritual warfare” going on in the world, I believe boils down to wicked people running the churches today. I have a story to share about walking out of a church service this weekend that I think correlates with the “servants of Jesus” being false witnesses and generally speaking the worst that mankind has to offer.

X37.9XXS > Wheelerguy 08/04/2015 at 09:39

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I’m okay with Jesus

It’s his fan club that I cannot stand

TwinCharged - Is Now UK Opponaut > Funktheduck 08/04/2015 at 10:44

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The twat thought that the original Mini was shit. I think I boiled over into a seething rage for about an hour.

Wheelerguy > X37.9XXS 08/04/2015 at 11:17

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Me too. Whatever Jesus said, he’s right, for the most part, but people just don’t get it.

Wheelerguy > Kat Callahan 08/04/2015 at 11:18

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That’s 3 out of 4 L’s. Good enough, but could be better.

AHA!

“LarryLehto’sLemonLawLibrary”

How’s that for a horse name?

Wheelerguy > Kat Callahan 08/04/2015 at 11:23

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I dislike His servants, by and large.

At best, you can see The Twelve as the first Clarkson, Hammond and May LIVE, though that makes Jesus the Andy Wilman.

But what if Jesus was to recruit his Apostles today, and from the moderators of Oppositelock?

Wheelerguy > TwinCharged - Is Now UK Opponaut 08/04/2015 at 11:24

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From what I know, Sir Bob Geldof is Jesus.

Funktheduck > TwinCharged - Is Now UK Opponaut 08/04/2015 at 11:30

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I can never quite tell if he’s trolling or if he’s just really one of the biggest bag of dicks on gawker.

The mini is awesome. I was tempted to buy one once but the guy was asking $7,500. It had front and rear damage. The hood couldn't close all the way as a result. It had civic seats (may be an upgrade). The paint was crap. From a distance it was great, the closer I got the worse it got.

TwinCharged - Is Now UK Opponaut > Funktheduck 08/04/2015 at 12:51

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$7,500?! For a damaged, shoddily modified Mini? Nooooope.

Funktheduck > TwinCharged - Is Now UK Opponaut 08/04/2015 at 13:01

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Yeah. This was about 6-7 years ago too. Right in the middle of the worst part of the recession. Original minis are cool but they're not that rare or made of gold